Things that go BUMP in the night

I bought Sam an adorable pair of Sully slippers from The Disney Store about a year ago. They were so cute that I bought them long before they'd ever fit him. Every so often, we'd pull them out and try them on. It should have been a clue that this day was coming that he was never very happy to see the fuzzy footwear, complete with claws.

When I say "this day" has come, I mean that we've reached the there-are-monsters-under-my-bed phase. Since Sam's bed is a bunk with the bottom mattress right on the floor, we don't actually get goblins *under* the bed. Ours hang out on the walls with "eyes" that stare at my poor kid as he's trying to sleep. They follow him to our room, too. If we bring him in to our bed to help him get some rest, he just stares at the place on the wall where a bit of a glow from the streetlight comes in, certain that those are moster eyes, too.

He's complained about it before, but not to the point of fearing his own room. He apparently was working his way up to all-out terror. I feel AWFUL about it. He's been waking up for a few nights, whining that he wants to come into our room. He usually starts at about midnight, and we have been thinking it was just a ploy (because he's gotten pretty good at those, too.)

Now I realize that he was probably just dropping off after a long time of fighting sleep for fear of being joined by monsters in his bed, and waking soon after, scared to death to open his eyes. Seriously, it would break your heart to see it.

As soon as Sam woke up for real this morning (at 7 a.m.... Hallelujah! He may have finally gotten past the 4:30 wakings, though I'm half-guessing those might be monster-related, too.) he started telling us all about the "scary, scary monsters" hiding in his room. We told him that monsters aren't allowed in our house, so it must have been his imagination, much like when he pretends to make us blueberry pie.

He wasn't buying it, so he and I went off to Target right after church today. If you didn't know, the store that has everything you'll ever need also carries monster spray, cleverly disguised in a 79-cent spray bottle that we filled with H2O at home. (Funny aside: when I picked up the bottle and held it up to show Sam in the cart, he squealed at me "Don't point that at me, Mommy! I'm not a monster!")

Just for good measure, we also got a Diesel 10 engine because Sam firmly believes that big metal claw is just the thing to threaten large monsters, and a little kiddie lantern that he can keep by his bed.

Perhaps it was overkill, but I remember being terrified of the scary old faces that I swore popped out of my Holly Hobbie curtains as soon as my mom tucked me in, too. Not gonna happen to my kid.

One more funny that's too good not to share (because there haven't been enough poop stories around here lately.) Sam's Sunday School teacher Susan saw him standing quietly in the corner of the room this morning.

SUSAN: Sam, are you ok over there?
SAM: Yes.
SUSAN: Are you poopin'?
SAM: Yes.
SUSAN... approaches Sam to change his diaper.
SAM: Stop. Please go to the other side of the room now. I poop by myself.